By Jontae Grace
There comes a time when, after enduring stress and struggle for so long, I feel spiritually and emotionally numb, and I looking at life like, “Whatever, motherfucker.” These moments of FuckItAll can be both a gift and a curse. On the one hand, I get a little bit more reckless. I don’t consider outcomes, I react based on the moment. But I also become more honest, unfiltered and closer to my truth. And while it hurts to hurt someone else, I notice that I never regret my honesty, only my delivery.
Sometimes life gets to be too much, so I just detach, and start to….un-care. Not because I genuinely don’t care, but because I don’t have the emotional energy left to care with. I no longer have it in me to fight every battle. Now, I only fight for causes I deem worthy. Things that I’d normally bicker and haggle about simply because that’s what lovers do, I don’t. But when important, I’ll spare no expense.
In getting older, I suppose I’ve learned a little bit about the way energy works. Our generation believes heavily in vibrations, energies and the principles of exchange. It explains a lot, and provides a compass that has proved invaluable as I’ve aged. I no longer place myself in the “young” category, defined as having the energy to devote to every issue. Those for whom every issue is a major issue, no matter how major or minor.
When you realize that your energy has limits, you become mindful to minimize such situations as you age, because you can feel stress greater. There are few things more unpleasant to me now as a high-tensioned exchange. I feel it physically, a sluggish and fatigued feeling in my chest and core. And so for my mental health I’ve decided to minimize such people as those who always have me in some shit, opting instead for those whose energy is more uplifting and less volatile.
Stress does horrible damage to our minds and bodies. I think that women get better by venting to release pent-up stress. Men hold onto it, and as time goes on, we begin to have health issues associated with the high-stress situations we put ourselves into. That is why we are now seeing black men dying in their mid to late forties due to health complications. Diet and exercise is only part of the reason. The other part is the stress that we have not properly released.
The first law of thermodynamics states that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transferred from one form to another. Why can’t it apply to people? If someone has a bad vibe or hella shit going on, it doesn’t just go away. It is transferred from one person to another, until it is given to you! We give each other bad energy all the time, with arguments, gossip and mess. You must choose to avoid it or minimize the necessary. Your very health depends on it.
Your energy is not infinite. Sooner or later, you will transition to the next phase of existence. So while you are here, make sure you protect your power. Why live a life fraught with tension, worry and conflict? Cultivate good energy, especially in matters of the heart. And watch carefully what you allow in your love life. Sometimes you get with people and their energy changes. Don’t be afraid to shed them along with other toxic thoughts, actions, and situations.